at the beginning of the 20th century. century there was no education in schools. The company wasn’t too tight-lipped about sex, to put it mildly. And on the second one
at the beginning of the 20th century. century there was no education in schools. The company wasn’t too tight-lipped about sex, to put it mildly. And on the other hand, brothels flourished. In this era, Marie Stopes published her guide “Marriage Love” in English: Love in Marriage.
Stopes was the first modern letter counselor. Men and women sought their advice in sexual matters. Sometimes you get 1000 emails in just one week.
the dangers of sex
People were not only ignorant, sex was a dangerous thing at that time. In the case of sexually transmitted diseases, there was no drug that promised a cure, once infected, it was a lifelong disease. Many women died during childbirth, had passions, fear of sex, and thus became pregnant. “Decent” men, on the other hand, the wedding missus wants your “animal” and asked for help to complete the marriage act in a way that your partner would not have to suffer unnecessarily.
The general mindset was that sex was a shame for women. Marie Stopes published her advisor 100 years ago. She urged that sex should not be a miserable duty, but a pleasure for both men and women. Shocking thesis of a young scientist. Stopes wrote: “Not every man is aware that he becomes a woman once and for all when he marries you. He must court her before every act of coitus.”
time of change
Stopes’ book sold sensationally and the time was ripe for it. Everywhere, the First World War led to the breakdown of the world of the 19th century. A century is lost. It is the era of the employee that started the mass production of consumer goods, and newspapers and magazines. The era of women also began. Self-employment and self-confident professional activities of women, of course, still existed for a long time, but there are also no exotic special cases. A young scientist with a doctorate was even a part of this Transformation, and they met the tone of the times. You have helped your readers gain control over their bodies.
More than 10,000 letters to Stopes are preserved in the British Library. They give a picture of the fears and hopes that ruled the bedroom.
extracts from letters
“I am a young mother of two beautiful children. I had a terrible time in labor. The doctor told me that I should have more children. Can you give me any advice on how to prevent them from happening again?”
“A friend asked me to gather reliable information on the following topic. You remember, marrying a man who is much younger than you. She is 61 years old and of course her period stopped some time ago.
she is afraid that she has absolutely no chance of pregnancy. Is this right? I enclose a self-addressed stamped envelope and pay the consultation fee.”
“I read your book “Married Love” tonight, and I can’t go to bed without writing to thank you for the great hope for the future of my married life, which the book has given me.”
“If you refer to it in her important book, Conjugal Love, on the matter of position, I think I may be permitted, as one who has had more than 20 years of unusually happy married life, perhaps a few words on the Appendix. what did you write
I don’t think the experience of the lady who told Grandbetting that she felt almost broke every time is that unusual. I know a beautiful young woman, she says to herself, you wouldn’t want her husband to be so difficult.
“It’s shocking to think that her delicate body is pinned under a heavy man tense and tight. This is both stupid and unnecessary.”
“I am writing to know if you can give me some advice. I am only 27 years old and have five children, the oldest is nine years old and the youngest is 18 months old. My husband is unemployed, and I am a constant worry – from month to month plagues, because I do not want to have more children. Hoping for a quick response.”
“Would you please tell me where I can buy the birth control devices mentioned in your book? I don’t have the courage to go into the store. The head nurse told me I should go to the women’s hospital, but you haven’t told me what I should ask, I’m gone.”
“You should write something about the narrow twin beds that are imported from continental countries. I don’t understand how you find the Par comfortable positions, but we will never use it.”
“We have a beautiful little girl. We have had three children before, but this is the first time that the child has lived. Since her birth, I have not had a proper relationship with my wife, because I had the feeling that I would give her back all the pain you had with the dead children. Also, she has no desire to have children.
However, we both love the joys of married life. I play with her fingers while she guards my “Person”. But I have a feeling that we are doing wrong, and now I am at a loss as to my duty.
I don’t call my name a letter, but maybe you’ll discuss this topic in the next book you write.”
“Does it indicate a filthy state of mind, when a man yields to his desire for fornication, or a woman to her desire for ordinary fornication?
Even if you are married – unless, that is, conception, the goal of a sexual relationship. Nothing degrades the mind more than this form of legalized fornication. Why don’t you recommend the only clean way? Abstinence!”
“you will return to your country of Scotland and preach your dirty methods. Decent Englishmen are disgusted with your dirty proposals in Conjugal Love.”
“I’m writing to you for your advice, because I’m very worried. The man I’m going to marry this year had an accident a few weeks ago. While I was helping, his blood-stained and torn clothes, I couldn’t help but notice that his genitals were very large. Ever since then, the thought of marriage worries me, because I am small in that respect.
Is there anything you can advise or suggest that would help me?
I should be grateful if you would tell me, as I have no mother or sister whom I can ask in this matter, and I would have no friend to ask, otherwise you might think I am rash.”
Her advisory activities were and are so memorable, so great is their contribution to medical care for women, Marie Stopes is not without controversy. How many sex researchers at that time advocated social-Darwinist theories of eugenics.
Date of update: December 8, 2018 at 08:01